cookie dough

I'm eating cookie dough, J made it and froze it for me. We made some cookies from it or she did but then she froze the rest and I have been eating it.

I am quite disconcerted. Things just are not firing the right way for me. I can't seem to shake the, what's the word, doldrums. Thats it. I need a job and am trying desperately to get one so I can begin the process of closing out a chapter in my life that I never wanted to close.

I can understand why some people do what they do. When you feel completely overwhelmed and can't see an end to the depression and hurt and all that you have caused it is easily understandable why people do what they do. No I'm not going to just saying I understand it.

J took the cookie dough away, which is a good thing. I don't need to eat myself to the size of a mac truck, probably not a problem because I dont really care about eating a lot. Just enough to survive and not be hungry is good. It's actually more healthy that way as well.

Later