wow nine days since my last post. I have had different thoughts as to what to write, different ideas as to something that would go through my thoughts and feelings, posts about other things just different posts and ideas about religion or bible thoughts or kids or whatever.
I guess the thing is sometimes writing things just to write them seems silly, I'm sort of tired of writing the way that I feel especially when it seems that it's all angst. Thats there but who knows. So I thought I would write something that was funny.
There were 2 snow days here in Gaithersburg and today there was a 2 hour delay. I was floored. There was not enough snow on the ground on Tuesday to make a snow ball but they still had the day off. Yesterday was a bit more understandable mainly because there was so much ice. Still I think things would have been fine for the kids to go. Funny how what people are used to makes them think that a dusting closes things.
I like what the Obama kids said, "but dad in chicago we would have gone outside for recess in this kind of weather.
Ah well it was nice to have our family together for 2 strait days.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
cookie dough
I'm eating cookie dough, J made it and froze it for me. We made some cookies from it or she did but then she froze the rest and I have been eating it.
I am quite disconcerted. Things just are not firing the right way for me. I can't seem to shake the, what's the word, doldrums. Thats it. I need a job and am trying desperately to get one so I can begin the process of closing out a chapter in my life that I never wanted to close.
I can understand why some people do what they do. When you feel completely overwhelmed and can't see an end to the depression and hurt and all that you have caused it is easily understandable why people do what they do. No I'm not going to just saying I understand it.
J took the cookie dough away, which is a good thing. I don't need to eat myself to the size of a mac truck, probably not a problem because I dont really care about eating a lot. Just enough to survive and not be hungry is good. It's actually more healthy that way as well.
Later
I am quite disconcerted. Things just are not firing the right way for me. I can't seem to shake the, what's the word, doldrums. Thats it. I need a job and am trying desperately to get one so I can begin the process of closing out a chapter in my life that I never wanted to close.
I can understand why some people do what they do. When you feel completely overwhelmed and can't see an end to the depression and hurt and all that you have caused it is easily understandable why people do what they do. No I'm not going to just saying I understand it.
J took the cookie dough away, which is a good thing. I don't need to eat myself to the size of a mac truck, probably not a problem because I dont really care about eating a lot. Just enough to survive and not be hungry is good. It's actually more healthy that way as well.
Later
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Religiosity
I have become increasingly annoyed with the religious, a state of being that I fear Christians in general in the united states have slipped deeper and deeper into.
Why do I write this. Well one of the interesting phenomena that I have seen in some Christians in the past few months has been this idea that Jesus was obviously a republican. In fact this has been the hearts cry of most Christian and church leaders for that past eight years. "No wait Aaron, thats not true, no one has said that Jesus is a republican."
Actions and intent are things that I have become intimately acquainted with in the past months. What we intend and what we do are often times different things, so while most church leaders and religious leaders in general would say it is not their intention to tell a person how to vote or to assign Jesus to a certain party, and while I can get behind that they do it none the less. Take a look for a moment at the chosen political party of the religious right, (an organization that most evangelicals are proud to be a member of,) The republican party has presided the last eight years in our country and they have not in my estimation lived in such a way that would say oh yea Jesus would vote for GW.
1. Weapons of Mass Destruction.
We have to go into Iraq because they have WMD's, it will keep us safe.
Fast forward to a time when the President is told that he had faulty intelligence and all of a sudden it was to take out Sadam Hussein, and bring Democracy to Iraq. A country and people who have always been a theocracy, with Kings and such. They don't want to vote someone in God is the one albeit not the God that I believe in but still god. So it's not possible.
2. Torture. Yea lets water board people. I did some research not a pleasant experience. Oh yea Jesus loves you.
One of the most disturbing things that I have heard was when asked what he will remember most about the presidency it was catching a fish in his private lake. Yea that makes me really proud.
Of course there is the economy which I don't lay at Bushes feet alone. I believe the Clinton years helped put us where we are. It just seems to me that the current regime seems intent on telling us that they are right and the religious churches and leaders line up because they agree with the conservative thoughts on Homosexuality and Abortion. Meanwhile the leadership is torturing people and leaving the people who are needy out in the cold.
Remember who Jesus distanced himself from. Not the sinners, not the messed up people, in fact the opposite is true he was the friend of sinners.
I believe that Jesus would not stand in our pulpits and say good job, I believe he would not endorse a republican or a democrat because he's supposed too.
Just a thought I think he would want to say to Christians both in churches and out, in as much as you've done it to the least of these (Read messed up hurting sick and wicked humanity) You've done it unto me.
Why do I write this. Well one of the interesting phenomena that I have seen in some Christians in the past few months has been this idea that Jesus was obviously a republican. In fact this has been the hearts cry of most Christian and church leaders for that past eight years. "No wait Aaron, thats not true, no one has said that Jesus is a republican."
Actions and intent are things that I have become intimately acquainted with in the past months. What we intend and what we do are often times different things, so while most church leaders and religious leaders in general would say it is not their intention to tell a person how to vote or to assign Jesus to a certain party, and while I can get behind that they do it none the less. Take a look for a moment at the chosen political party of the religious right, (an organization that most evangelicals are proud to be a member of,) The republican party has presided the last eight years in our country and they have not in my estimation lived in such a way that would say oh yea Jesus would vote for GW.
1. Weapons of Mass Destruction.
We have to go into Iraq because they have WMD's, it will keep us safe.
Fast forward to a time when the President is told that he had faulty intelligence and all of a sudden it was to take out Sadam Hussein, and bring Democracy to Iraq. A country and people who have always been a theocracy, with Kings and such. They don't want to vote someone in God is the one albeit not the God that I believe in but still god. So it's not possible.
2. Torture. Yea lets water board people. I did some research not a pleasant experience. Oh yea Jesus loves you.
One of the most disturbing things that I have heard was when asked what he will remember most about the presidency it was catching a fish in his private lake. Yea that makes me really proud.
Of course there is the economy which I don't lay at Bushes feet alone. I believe the Clinton years helped put us where we are. It just seems to me that the current regime seems intent on telling us that they are right and the religious churches and leaders line up because they agree with the conservative thoughts on Homosexuality and Abortion. Meanwhile the leadership is torturing people and leaving the people who are needy out in the cold.
Remember who Jesus distanced himself from. Not the sinners, not the messed up people, in fact the opposite is true he was the friend of sinners.
I believe that Jesus would not stand in our pulpits and say good job, I believe he would not endorse a republican or a democrat because he's supposed too.
Just a thought I think he would want to say to Christians both in churches and out, in as much as you've done it to the least of these (Read messed up hurting sick and wicked humanity) You've done it unto me.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Mars Edit
Just thought I would give mars edit a try. I am just moving all sorts of things around.
Someone commented that at least we dont need help putting on our shoes or something like that. Well the problem with that is today I did. the Back surgery that I had back in 01 worked great but for some reason ie my own stupidity, my back is now hurting more than it was, and I'm out of one of the pills that help it get back to normal. J gets paid friday I am desperatly looking for a job. Just pray that it goes back into place I guess, I mean if your a praying person.
More later probably a video blog or something.
Someone commented that at least we dont need help putting on our shoes or something like that. Well the problem with that is today I did. the Back surgery that I had back in 01 worked great but for some reason ie my own stupidity, my back is now hurting more than it was, and I'm out of one of the pills that help it get back to normal. J gets paid friday I am desperatly looking for a job. Just pray that it goes back into place I guess, I mean if your a praying person.
More later probably a video blog or something.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Restoration
I have been wondering what restoration really is. I am not really sure any more. Several years ago, I did an entire sermon on what restoration was, it was based on this car that my uncle gave me. See when I was a kid I remember this car very well. It was pretty cool only 1700 or so of them were ever produced in the US. It was a Saab Sonnet.
[caption id="attachment_66" align="alignnone" width="143" caption="The Past"]
[/caption]
That's what it looked like. I really loved the car and when my uncle was liquidating all his stuff after his wife passed he gave me the car. It was not in the best of shape though. It was messed up. See it had sat for years and years in a garage and when it did it began to fall apart. It was then stored in our garage for several years while I stupidly got other things instead of restoring the car. The thing about it was that the body of the car would never rust out. It was fiberglass. It was made to last forever or just about. Kinda like humanity. We were made to be eternal, so what happened. Well while the outside of the car that everyone could see was not going to rust the undercarriage the part that you can't see was rusting away and not just a little bit, a lot bit, however whenever I looked in the garage it looked fine, I tried to fix it on my own at one point. Using wood and spray paint to hold it together. It would never work. Fast Forward to 2 years ago. We finally decided to get it fixed when were were going to move. I was going to leave it in Ohio to be fixed, and then drive it back after a wedding I was going to be preforming. We had the guy that was going to fix it come to tow it to his place and when they lifted the car up we found out that there was no possible way for the car to be fixed for less than 2500 bucks, and it would most likely be more, it was going to take a major amount of work and so we decided that we would just sorta drop it we scrapped the thing I think I got maybe a hundred bucks for it from the guy that towed it away.
What's this mean. I wonder at what point God gives up on restoring someone. I know or at least I think I know at what point humanity does. We make the decision based on what we think is the most beneficial to our personal comfort or the comfort of the people involved. If the cost or the comfort outweighs the value of the person then we decide against restoration. This is not a value judgement for all those reading this that think I'm pointing fingers. I'm not just saying what I think they think, I did the same thing, or have done the same thing, which really stinks because I know better or should. Still what about God. When does his restoration end. Forgiveness still happens but is there a point where we outstretch our ability to be used in the calling that we used to have.
I don't know the answer. I have come to the realization that I never did really know a lot of answers.
[caption id="attachment_66" align="alignnone" width="143" caption="The Past"]
That's what it looked like. I really loved the car and when my uncle was liquidating all his stuff after his wife passed he gave me the car. It was not in the best of shape though. It was messed up. See it had sat for years and years in a garage and when it did it began to fall apart. It was then stored in our garage for several years while I stupidly got other things instead of restoring the car. The thing about it was that the body of the car would never rust out. It was fiberglass. It was made to last forever or just about. Kinda like humanity. We were made to be eternal, so what happened. Well while the outside of the car that everyone could see was not going to rust the undercarriage the part that you can't see was rusting away and not just a little bit, a lot bit, however whenever I looked in the garage it looked fine, I tried to fix it on my own at one point. Using wood and spray paint to hold it together. It would never work. Fast Forward to 2 years ago. We finally decided to get it fixed when were were going to move. I was going to leave it in Ohio to be fixed, and then drive it back after a wedding I was going to be preforming. We had the guy that was going to fix it come to tow it to his place and when they lifted the car up we found out that there was no possible way for the car to be fixed for less than 2500 bucks, and it would most likely be more, it was going to take a major amount of work and so we decided that we would just sorta drop it we scrapped the thing I think I got maybe a hundred bucks for it from the guy that towed it away.
What's this mean. I wonder at what point God gives up on restoring someone. I know or at least I think I know at what point humanity does. We make the decision based on what we think is the most beneficial to our personal comfort or the comfort of the people involved. If the cost or the comfort outweighs the value of the person then we decide against restoration. This is not a value judgement for all those reading this that think I'm pointing fingers. I'm not just saying what I think they think, I did the same thing, or have done the same thing, which really stinks because I know better or should. Still what about God. When does his restoration end. Forgiveness still happens but is there a point where we outstretch our ability to be used in the calling that we used to have.
I don't know the answer. I have come to the realization that I never did really know a lot of answers.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Amazing abilities
Today we decided that we were going to head to our favorite grocery store and use the final gift certificates that we had. Instead of going to the one that we knew I thought it would be cool to find one that was closer... Big Mistake. For some strange reason I have this wonderful talent for finding and then driving through / visiting the HOOD wherever we are from. It doesn't really bother me people are people, however it's different when you have 2 kids and a wife that you are concerned for. J and I have lived in nice places and not so nice. Rock road and some of the places in youngstown were not that great but when you add the daughters to the mix, daughters that are extremely stubborn and want their own way well it is cause for concern.
Still it was an adventure... albeit one that we are not going to repeat.
Hope all is well with those reading. Enjoy your day and if you think of it send up a prayer, been a difficult couple of days and I just want to get out of it if that makes sense.
Still it was an adventure... albeit one that we are not going to repeat.
Hope all is well with those reading. Enjoy your day and if you think of it send up a prayer, been a difficult couple of days and I just want to get out of it if that makes sense.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
something different
Today has been taxing but I did get this one thing figured out. I can't wait to see how it looks. Let me know what you think. PLEASE even if you don't think I care I crave some comments on this piece of work.
Zoey Comic
Zoey Comic
Monday, January 5, 2009
losing it
I am pretty close to losing it. Something has to give and I have to see an end to this at some point. I need NEED NEED a job. I need to feel usefull, I need to feel like I am not a huge failure. I'm selfish I realize that but it's just how it is. I'm ready to pop a spring with the whole thing.
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