Tuesday, March 3, 2009

out of sight...

This seems to be conventional wisdom for some. They think that as long as you can't see something then you don't have to think about it. Well as most know this is one of those platitudes that one says to make themselves feel better.

It's not true though just because I don't see things doesn't mean that they are out of my mind or heart. I guess I need to say that here because some may think that I don't care about others, or that I don't feel what they think I should feel or how I should feel it. There does however come a time when you have to face the facts that the feelings and longings you have are just that feelings and longings. I think that people who want to feel upset or to try and say the person that they are upset with hasn't done what they want them to do when it comes to remorse or forgiveness or whatever is more about them. That they have power as long as they can say to themselves that the other person just didn't do enough to get my forgiveness, acceptance, grace whatever it is. Humanity loves power thats one of our chief problems and even if it's power over another person we crave it. I'm not accusing anyone I'm just realizing that all those times when I have said that the other person didn't do it right was me attempting to exercise some form of control or power over them, the thing is that only works if the person allows it.

So what's this mean. Not sure, as a people pleaser it's hard for me to not allow people's feelings and opinions about me to rule my life, but I do know I need to try.

I wish I could say that out of sight out of mind was true. It's not though, at least not for me.

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